You've Got that 100% Assbackwards...

One narrative that pisses me off until my eyelid twitches is when privileged leftists dismiss concerns of oppression, imperialism, etc. with shit like "after the revolution, there'll be no X".  After the Revolution, there'll be no sexism.  After the Revolution, there'll be no racism.  After the Revolution, there'll be no imperialism.  And so on.

The thing is though, that they have it totally backwards.  While it is true that a fully Marxist system (in the opinion of, well a Marxist) is one without any oppression or social class distinctions, the entire point of the Revolution (whatever means you think are acceptable there, democratic change, direct action, violent resistance, etc. you can't really be a leftist and not think it's necessary) is to try and end oppression.  It's a trivial truth that in a fully Marxist society sexism will not exist, for example, because eliminating sexism is required to have a fully Marxist society.  You can't have a fully Marxist society and not have gotten rid of your racism, sexism, imperialism, anti-queer oppression, etc.  It's not that we will have the Revolution and then all oppression will magically end, the Revolution IS the struggle to end oppressions.  Any Revolution that does not seek to and fully strive to end all forms of oppression is not a fully Marxist Revolution, any end state that could be reached while still allowing oppression and class distinctions is no Marxism.

So don't you privileged leftists dare say that oppression will be over after the Revolution to dismiss concerns of other leftists in regards to specific types or systems of oppression.  That is so absolutely backwards.  Ending all oppression is the goal of the Revolution, it is the aim of the Revolution.  Marxism is at its very core supposed to be a theory for dismantling oppression.  Any way that you fail to do so is a failure to achieve total Revolution and total Marxism.  Ending sexism, racism, imperialism, cissexism, anti-queer oppression, classism, etc. are necessary parts of the Revolution, not potential fringe benefits. 

Starting to Collect a List of Non-negative Fat Anime Characters

So, I have been watching Accel World, and really, really enjoying having a short fat protagonist in an anime.  I also find it interesting that the rest of the characters remain the more common long, thin shape. 

  

That's Haruyuki Arita, third from the left, our sweet but insecure protagonist.  

As positive fat characters are so rare in anime, I thought I would start making up a list.   The criteria are relatively straightforward, the character has to be fat, chubby, or heavyset; the character has to not be all about anti-fat jokes or be a villain; the character has to appear in more than one episode/have a name/have a number of lines (in other words, they have to actually be more than an extra).

Probably the best known fat anime character (with the possible exception of Gluttony from FMA, who is exempted for obvious reasons) is Choji from Naruto.

While Choji is not a villainous character and has some role other than as an 'ew fat' punchline, he is also rather stereotypical, and is used as the butt of jokes around his size on the show.

In no particular order except how they entered my brain, here are a few more non-negative fat anime characters:

Sumiyo Fukabori of Saki, she is a chubby minor side character who is on one of the majong teams

While she might be better classified as stocky rather than fat, I'm going to include Elizabeth Liati from Kenran Butoh Sai The Mars Daybreak.  Liati is the captain of a Martian submarine.

Kugayama Mitsunori of Genshiken, an otaku (like every other character on that show):

Chieko from Kuragehime, lover of dolls and kimonos, excellent seamstress

  Kohto Hirano from High School of the Dead.  This is a very sexist echi anime, and ya'll probably know I'm not a big fan of echi, but I have this zombie obsession...anyways, Hirano fits under the fat and non-negative character category

I did find this discussion over on gaia forums (warning this link is not a safe space regarding size acceptance or body size) but it does not separate negative from non-negative portrayals.  http://www.gaiaonline.com/forum/recycle-bin/are-there-any-fat-obese-anime-characters/t.55360301_1/ though it did remind me to add

Kōsaku Tokita from Paprika (which is a feature film, not a series):

Also need to add Daru from Steins Gate, the hacker:

A friend of a friend on twitter recommended this one awhile back (sorry for the late update there, I've been rather sick lately, and the second link they gave has gone dead):

Mao Daidoji (http://myanimelist.net/character/21458/Mao_Daidoji)

Happy May Day

Happy May Day.  

Picture of Emilia Plater

I'm sitting in class and not rebelling, because I need my attendance points.  I've taken too many sick days this semester.

Can you be against feminism without being a misogynist?

I think the answer to this question lies in distinguishing feminism as a set of movements and feminism as an ideal.

There are valid criticisms of feminist movements, and those that genuinely and honestly dislike feminism as a movement because of those things are not necessarily woman haters, and in some cases are anything but.  A non-feminist identified womanist who feels alienated by the history of erasure of woman of color and racism by some sections of the feminist movement is not a misogynist.  A trans woman who criticizes histories of transphobia within certain sections of the feminist movement is not engaging in woman hating solely by doing so.

On the other hand, attacks on feminism qua feminism, as a movement for rights of women, as women's non-inferiority and personhood, etc. are inherently misogynist.  Opposition to the notion that women are full people is misogynist to its very core, assertions that women should be denied bodily autonomy or access to social participation is intrinsically misogynist.  There is no real way to attack the idea of opposition to oppression of women as such and not being a misogynist.

Misogynist anti-feminist love to conflate their intrinsically misogynist attacks on feminism with the not intrinsically misogynist genuine criticisms of various feminist movements, but they are not the same thing at all.  The form, content, and intent of criticisms of feminism absolutely do matter.

If someone says that they do not like feminism because they have experienced a great deal of classism in feminist spaces, that alone does not make them a misogynist or indicate they are a misogynist.  However, those that take issue with feminism because it aims to advocate against sexist oppression, they are simply misogynists.

Oh, Crimes Against Hughs Manatees, You Understand Me So Well

From http://crimesagainsthughsmanatees.tumblr.com/post/7830004306

"How Not To Fight Racism" Response

This is a response to this article http://socialistworker.org/blog/critical-reading/2012/04/05/how-not-fight-racism

            Co-option, flagrant privilege, and denials of oppressive systems are not shows of solidarity.  Solidarity is something that must be done with conscious listening to the needs and wants of the group at issue, and acting only in accordance with those.  Suggesting that you are Trayvon as a white person is totally and absolutely missing the entire point.  It isn’t solidarity, it’s reinforcing the problem.  If you are white, Trayvon was not killed for the ways he may be like you or the white kids in your family, he was killed for the ways in which he is different.  If you need to whiten him and deny that he was a black child, the very reason he was killed, in order to try to “empathize” or “sympathize” with him, then you are supporting the social systems which have led to his death and the deaths of uncounted other young black people and reinforcing the notion that the more black a person is, the less human they are.

            Showing that you oppose the system that killed Trayvon Martin and Troy Davis absolutely requires showing that you have some fucking inkling of the fact that they were killed because they are not white like you.  If that child and that man were white like you, they would not have been killed.  So the fact that you give no pause to announcing that you are them is extremely indicative that you are not acting in solidarity, you are acting because you want to be seen as a ‘good white person’ not because you actually want to end racism.

“Isn’t it possible, even likely, that people protesting racism wearing these t-shirts actually oppose racism and don’t seek to justify it? If not, then everything we do is called into question as possibly its opposite; nothing we do matters, nothing we say or argue has any validity, but must be suspect as meaning its complete opposite.”

          Except that is patently not the argument put forth in the video.  If you cannot think of a single thing to do to oppose racism other than a clueless co-opting t-shirt, you really are not actively working to end racism.  You are engaging in a strawman argument here, nowhere did the person in the video or almost anyone else ever present the argument you are attributing to her.  Her argument was that this specific act, wearing an “I am Trayvon” t-shirt as a white person, reinforces the very racist systems and patterns of thought that lead to the murder in the first place.  Suggesting that if a person says one type of ineffective or oppressive ‘activism’ is invalid then they believe any activism at all is invalid is a patently absurd argument.

“Racism, according to this thinking, is not the result of a ruling class’s need to structure oppression in order to gain profits and spread crappy ideas that divide the working class majority from itself.”

          This is an extremely over-simplistic analysis of the way class systems work.  Racism is a system designed to support the exploitation of black labor and black bodies (as well as the labor and bodies of other people of color) and to justify brutalities against them.  It is not simply some post-hoc attempt to divide the working class, though systematically it is effective in doing so.  Divisiveness is one of the means of perpetuation of the system, it is not the root goal.  Oppressive social systems interact with each other in people in complex ways, your analysis erases the ways in which people face multiple forms of marginalization and oppression.  There exists decades of scholarship on these matters from marginalized women around sexist oppression, bell hooks, Kimberle Krenshaw…do a bit of reading critical feminist race theory and black feminism. 

  “Third, according to her “white privilege” argument, there are no distinctions between whites in positions of power and the majority without.”

          This is not what white privilege means, and there are libraries of scholarship on that matter.  Are you being deliberately clueless, or are you just this grossly ignorant of critical race theory and black scholarship around racism?

 “She refers to “the system,” but has no class outlook in which to analyze how the system works and in whose interests. Because if all white people benefit— which includes the majority of people on food stamps, on unemployment and living in poverty in the United States — then these benefits are rather illusory, aren’t they?”

This is flat out false.  As a blond haired, blue eyed person who grew up in poverty and has done anti-racist education with poor white people, it is hard to even begin to say how wrong this statement is.  Poor white people benefit materially from white privilege. Granted, not in the exact same ways as rich white people (again, see intersectionality).  Poor white people find employment easier than their black low income peers.  This is true even when the white person has a criminal record and the black person does not.  Employment discrimination against black people is rampant at low wage levels as well, which feeds the extremely high unemployment rates in black communities.  Poor white people find housing easier than their poor black peers, because housing discrimination against black people is rampant at all income levels.   Poor black students are beaten and punished within the education system more than poor white students.   Poor black people are murdered by the police more than poor white people.  Poor black communities are over-policed and subject to police search polices more than poor white communities.  Poor white students get MORE need based scholarships than poor black students, both by numbers and percentages.   In every area of life, poor black people face additional discrimination on top of what poor white people face.  And that’s not even getting into wider colonialist systematic benefits and damages.

All poor people get a lot of horrible things thrown at them, that’s indisputable, but black poor people and white poor people do not face the same social realities.  Racism and racist oppression are very real in these communities.  White poor people get advantages due to being white.   They get preference in jobs, education, and housing over other poor people.  It is a mistake to say that because poor white people would ultimately be better off if they were willing to trade advantages over poor people of color for class solidarity that poor white people do not materially benefit from white privilege and racist systems.  

“This video reflects a politically confused way of talking about race as if it were simply about bad ideas in people’s heads and not conscious structures of oppression kept in place by the 1% in the interests of the 1%.”

This is a false dichotomy.   There is no reason to think that these two types of racist thinking can’t and don’t coexist.  Racism involves both intentional exploitation and complex systems of social relationships that influence thinking in often unconscious ways.  Social systems of consciousness and understanding are deeply ingrained ways of knowing and perceiving the world, trained into us usually from birth.  The way rich people look at poor people and perceive our lives is certainly not all about conscious decisions to fuck over poor people, though some of it is, it is about ways of thinking and knowing that they have been taught their entire lives.  That all of us have been taught our entire lives.  I am pretty sure that there was no conscious classism board that sat down and handed my mother a curriculum to use to ingrain in us the idea that we should see our lives as shameful because of being poor.  Racism works in similar, though not always directly comparable, ways.  BOTH explicit and implicit bias play a role, BOTH intentionally and unintentional discrimination and systems play a role.

And it’s just flat out racist to suggest that the problems of racism dividing poor communities are found in black people refusing to accept racism and not in white people refusing to not be racist.  Which, for your information, is also the point that even the upperclass ‘talented tenth’ theorist Dubois was making:

“So long as the Southern white laborers could be induced to prefer poverty to equality with the Negro, just so long was a labor movement in the South made impossible.”

Then, as now, too many poor white people chose short term benefits over poor people of color rather than long term benefits of class unity.  You are blaming the victims of racism, he is blaming the perpetrators.  Denying racism and putting the burden on black people to swallow the racism of poor white people (who are not more racist per se than rich white people, but racist in ordinary amounts for white people, in other words, there’s plenty of racism) does not build class solidarity.  In fact, it does the exact opposite.  It trains us not to be critical about the ways in which different sections of poor communities interact.  It trains us to be okay with watching brutality against certain sections of poor people.  It trains us to not critique the ways in which these other oppressive systems are linked together.  Rather than telling poor black people that they should not address racism against them or the ways in which racism harms their communities, building class solidarity would be building an understanding in white poor people that racism is a brutal oppressive system which they should neither tolerate nor participate in.  If we want to search for leftist models of building anti-racist class solidarity, we would be better served to look for guidance to the work of another black man murdered by a racist system, Fred Hampton, of the Black Panther Party for Self Defense than we would be to look to the dismal failures of some early leftist unions on issues of racist policies around black and Asian workers.

Anyways, look, we could have a complex discussion about racialized classism, classist racism, intersectionality, and racial dynamics within poor communities, but this article is not showing even a passing familiarity with the basics of this discussion.

The only thing this article got right is that white people should not wear Zimmerman shirts, but not for the reasons you suggest, but rather because without further context, it might be assumed that a person wearing such a shirt was supportive of Zimmerman’s actions, rather than critiquing social relationships.  However, as a friend of mine noted, you do not have to wear either shirt, you can just wear a regular shirt and participate in work around these issues.  Again, seriously, if an erasing t-shirt is the only idea you can come up with for combating racism and showing solidarity around racist violence, you are already failing at both of those tasks.

“Perhaps the most telling thing about this “white privilege” argument is that many radicals have had their sights for justice set so low that it has come to be thought of as a privilege not to be gunned down in the night on a snack errand while wearing a hoodie because of the color of your skin. Isn’t that simply a human right?”

It shouldn’t be a privilege, just like healthcare shouldn’t be a privilege, but right now, it most certainly is.  White people have the benefit over black people of not being murdered because of their race by our racist system. Welcome to reality.

Brief Reviews of a Few of the Season's New Anime

May contain mild spoilers, only addresses the first episode though

Haiyoru!  Nyaruko-san.

 This anime did not wow me at all.  I found the plot somewhat unoriginal (violent women protecting weak guys who they love is in at the moment).  The background music was annoying, the lead guy's voice actor was solid, the animation looks nice.  Okay, this was supposed to be a comedy, but the humor just isn't doing it for me and I'm bored with it, obviously.

Grade: C- Though, to be fair, I didn't find it funny.  It is possible that its humor may suit others better. 

Saki Achiga-Hen

 I'll admit to starting out with a favorable bias on this one.  I really enjoyed the first season.  So, I think I am prone to give this show a lot more leeway to pick up than I might others.  Like the first series, this is a female centered story, with close female friends and teammates interacting in very positive ways.  You really feel for these girls and their friendships.  That said, it could use a bit more of the fast paced majong tournament scenes that were so expertly directed in the first series and kept it with a more upbeat pace.  I generally prefer a faster pace to the slower "slice of life" type of anime.  Still, I think that this episode managed to hold attention well enough, and established relationships and basic background.  I'm optimistic on this one, especially as the first series had so much to recommend it (including a positively depicted female side character who was fat, which is a rare thing in anime).

Grade B.  As I said, I want some more of the faster paced scenes that spiced up the first series, which was a solid Grade A.

Hiiro no Kakera

Your standard reverse harem with a fantasy backdrop.  On the negative side, the better reverse harems generally depend a lot on the strength of their characters, especially the heroines, and this one's didn't stand out. On the other hand...bishies and cute magic fox pets.  I strongly approve of those things. 

Grade B.  Because bishies and cute magic fox pets, that's why.  I make no apologies for my (bad) tastes.

Nazo no Kanojo X

I must admit, the opening scenes of this one turned me off.  I have a policy to not watch echi.  It pisses me off far too much.  I was worried that the mention of sex from the get go might be a sign of echi style.  I was pleasantly surprised to find out otherwise.  Unlike the fairly obvious and cheap objectification that is so common in echi, this anime depicted attraction in a sort of awkward somewhat kinky at times way that I found sort of adorable in general.  I thought was actually a teen love story that I found I could relate to.  It's not oh, huge water balloon boobs sexy attraction, it's you are so gorgeous it takes my breath away even when you have drool on your chin intense teen crush attraction.  And the heroine is weird.  Not just "cutely quirky", actually weird.  Burst out laughing randomly in class and roll around on the floor weird.  I am liking this relationship enough that I find it carries what otherwise might seem like a very contrived background plot with the sci-fi spit addiction stuff.  It also had me laughing at times.  The spit addiction even sort of works as a metaphor for those intense confusing adolescent desires.  My biggest criticism of this anime would be that the lead guy engaged in borderline creepy behavior, not rapey type creepy by any means, so it's a smaller concern at the moment.  I really enjoyed this episode and I look forward to the rest of the series, though I hope it keeps up the good work and doesn't let me down.

Grade A.  Really, of all of the new anime I have watched so far for this season (which isn't all of them, to be fair), this one stood out the most and was the most genuinely entertaining.  I really like that this anime can address sexuality and attraction without falling into those old suckass echi pitfalls.

DID YA'LL KNOW THERE'S GOING TO BE A STAR TREK MOVIE??? (aka history amuses me)

So, my landlady/upstairs neighbor loaned me a box of old sci-fi books from her attic.  It is part of my upbringing to be gracious towards old ladies, so whatever.  Anyways, it had this kids magazine from 1980 (I know this was the year because it had a piece on the "upcoming" 1980 winter olympics) which has a feature about the Star Trek movie in it.  Watching the author describe what trekkies are and shit was totally hilarious.  Here's the scans, I only bothered to scan in the Trek parts (though if anyone wants the part about bears, CHIPS, or the 1980 Winter Olympics, if you let me know in the near future, I can totally score you those scans too XD )

(P.S. I know no one reads my blog, but if anyone does and happens to need a transcript, leave a comment and I'll see what I can do)

Coko and Trayvon

I just read this moving post over at queer black feminist http://queerblackfeminist.blogspot.com/2012/04/trayvon-martin-was-good-boy.html and it got me thinking of this http://leftytgirl.wordpress.com/2012/04/03/transmisogynistic-media-report-on-murdered-trans-woman-from-detroit-local-fox-affiliate/

Both Coko and Trayvon are being painted as bad subjects by so many people, bad victims, as "criminals", as not worthy of respect even when they are murdered.  Because they are marginalized people, they get presumed to be bad, to be unworthy.  And it is just so very fucked up.  They were murdered.  And people are painting them as bad to try and suggest they are unworthy of life and unworthy of mourning in death.  Marginalized people don't get to be human, don't get to make mistakes, don't get to be living and surviving in the rough situations they often are placed in by that very marginalization, don't get to be kids and friends and lovers, they just get to be "criminals" who we shouldn't be crying so much over.

A young autistic child is a threat in their eyes, not a person, not a beloved son or neighbor, and a butter knife becomes a steakknife to them.  http://www.nbcchicago.com/news/local/calumet-city-police-stephon-steven-watts-139072509.html

Edit:  Rekia Boyd was not a bad or unworthy human being either.  http://www.blackyouthproject.com/2012/03/22-year-old-rekia-boyd-killed-by-off-duty-chicago-police-officer-cellphone-mistaken-for-handgun/

I don't want to want more things I can't have

So...I've been re-thinking the issue of hormones lately.  I have known for some time that I wanted rid of the breasts, but hormones I was not sure about.  Partially because I needed time to see what my body would work like not being on estrogen containing pills for the PCOS.  Because, I have testosterone that is higher than what is considered "normal" for a cis woman by a good shot anyways, but I also have "average" levels of estrogen and progesterone.

Also, can I just say here how tired I am of this myth that estrogen and progesterone don't really shape the body all that much and that testosterone is so powerful and overwhelming?  Not all FAAB trans people have naturally "boyish" figures.  No one in the history of my life has considered my figure boyish.  It takes quite a bit of baggy clothes and binding to reshape the lines of my body to get taken as not a woman on a few occaions (which means getting taken as a man, which also doesn't really reflect reality, what makes me happiest is when I get "ma'am" at one place, cross the street and get "sir").  I went from tiny and delicate as a small child to curvy and broad hipped and big breasted, and then to curvy and broad hipped and big breasted and fat.  "Normal" levels of estrogen and progesterone are more than enough to shape a body in huge ways even with testosterone levels in between what would be expected for a cis male and a cis female.

I've been watching my body during this time, experiencing being an adult and watching and feeling my hormones shift.  I've purposefully tried to focus on keeping my speaking voice in the lower range, but now I feel like I have the voice of a thirteen year old cis boy.  Did you know when I'm not on hormones and my voice slips into certain modes, I can sing low enough to go along with a tenor and then slip back into soprano as falsetto or on other days soprano as just my base tone?  My voice even cracks sometimes.  I've never left puberty.

 I can watch my face shape change and shift.

 I know whether my testosterone or estrogen or both are high with a pretty good estimate at this point from observing my body.

I've had six months in a row without periods before, that's what got me in for a PCOS diagnosis.  Now, if I don't get a period every three or four months or so, I medically induce one.  I don't really have bottom dysphoria (I mean, I am one of those people who doesn't find the idea of having other genitals upsetting, but also doesn't feel upset by them as they are) and menstruation is not dysphoria inducing for me.   That certainly doesn't apply to all genderqueer people, it's just the way I feel.  It doesn't particularly bother me.  I don't have too many physical symptoms around menstruation like some people, so that might be part of it (I don't get anemia at times like my older sister does, I don't have bad cramping like my little sister).  If anything, the break in hormonal wildness that it usually takes to produce a period without pills means that I feel rather good and calm.  And, now that I get my body better, I'm much better at estimating when they are coming, so it doesn't have the panic inducing randomness factor that used to bother me as a kid.

Anyways, I wonder sometimes if I should consider going on blockers and hormones.  I wonder if they would make my thighs a bit less...well...but I had very wide hips even when thinner, they aren't really going to get small, and I wear long enough shorts that it's less of a big deal in public anyways.  It might help with the voice stuff.  But, when I start wondering, a lot of times I will shut myself down thinking "I don't need to want them anyways, I don't want to want them anyways.  You can't have top surgery realistically for years yet, and you've wanted that way longer and way harder.  Why even want hormones if you just know you can't have them?  Wouldn't that just upset you?  Just don't think about it."

And, I'm not sure that I want hormones anyways, but I want to get over that hump.  I want to be able to think about and explore that idea like I have other stuff, regardless of what the end decision might be.   Stinking medical gatekeeping, it's even interfering with my brain's ability to let me figure out what I want.

An Inadequacy of Terms

So, yeah, I spent way more time playing with this in class than I should have (available here http://www.dolldivine.com/marie-antoinette.php).  But it got me thinking again about a terminology issue I've been struggling with.  I think we all know that within trans communities, anti-femme sentiment exists, and some trans people are targeted more by each other and by society for certain types of violence and oppression.  But, what terms do we use?  FAAB and MAAB are sometimes useful, we can talk about violence and rhetorics that target more harshly MAAB trans people, including trans women, and how some FAAB trans people, including trans men, sometimes direct those unique combinations of sexism, femmephobia, and transphobia against them as well.  However, some people, especially non-binary or non-normative presenting people find these terms reductive.  Not everyone thinks that it's okay for people to be that focused on their birth assignment when discussing their experiences and bodies.  But, terms like "trans feminine" and "trans masculine" certainly don't work either.  Butch trans women, femme trans men, genderqueer people who do not present as just butch or femme do exist.  So, am I a butch or a femme?  Feminine or Masculine.  Mostly, I talk about being coded butch or masculine, but a lot of that is a function of the fact that most people who I encounter perceive me as a woman, which I am not.  If you look at my behavior through that lens, I am on the butcher side in most people's eyes.  But what if you looked at me as a man (something I also am not)?  Then my habit of painting my nails, my Mario Mushroom earings, my playing with dress up dolls on the internet, that I am willing to wear bright pink shirts, that I sometimes willingly dress up more high femmey as an almost costume sort of deal, makes me far more than the normative level of femme for a man.  We certainly need terms to discuss which trans people are the targets of transmisogyny, the people who are targeted by transphobic violence at higher rates, the unique ways in which sex assigned at birth and appearance and perception interact, and we need to be discussing these things.  I just think that when people group me as "transmasculine", they should consider the discourses they are using and the frameworks in which they are viewing me.

Tired...

I feel so tired and washed out right now

Image from Crepuscule

Tatakau Shisho, First Episode, Review

Okay, so I decided to give this anime a shot.  It opened up pretty well, with nice almost chilling atmosphere as a person repeats answers in a sort of empty, brainwashed manner to a phonograph. 

Except then, it ruins the somewhat morbid mood of the show with these:

Meet the Boobs.  You will see them more often than her face.  Seriously, this character's face is not shown when she is introduced, only her extremely large physics defying breasts.  This show takes every excuse to pan up her body to show her chest, including a hilarious sequence where she's talking to a woman telepathically and all you see is her breasts.  Shit, I don't know, maybe they are telepathic boobs.

We get a neat battlescene with a lot of action and some gore.  Which is going well, but then the Boobs show up again to kill the mood.

Yes, her shirt is wet.  No, that's not particularly important to anything in the plot.  This show actually has a lot going for it, the story seems interesting overall.  We've got human bombs, brainwashing, cults...but the cheap excuse to show those Boobs is a total buzzkill.  I can like this anime, the one with somber images and hints at an underlying nasty of social systems and torment:

Not this one, which is gratuitous images of ecchi boobs:

This is about how I'm feeling in regards to my schoolwork at the moment

(Image from Crepuscule)

Queer Babies

Sometimes, I wish I bought into the idea that queerness and transness were genetic.  I have a certain fondness for the notion of having and raising queer trans babies, of being able to share queer and trans cultures and community ties with them, of having.  Maybe it would be enough to tip the scales and make me willing to face the social hell that would be heaped on me if I ever had kids if I could know that I'd be able to have little queer trans aspie kids.  I could read them Feinberg for bedtime stories, help them learn the eyebrow codes, and show them queer movies.  They'd grow up knowing their history, Compton Cafeteria Riots and Lawrence v. Texas. And dysphoria sucks, but if my babies had dysphoria, I would get them treatment, I would fight for them.  Because we already have cures for a great deal of dysphoria.  We've got hormones and surgeries.  It's one of those things that transphobes don't think of when they suggest we need "cured".  We've been working on that, and we've made a shit ton of medical progress, and if people would stop getting in our way, we'd make even more.  It's just our version of what we need is totally fucking different from what they imagine people should need.

Of course, in real life, you wouldn't know, and in real life, the trans or queer kids of a genderqueer queer person might tear themselves up and tangle themselves up because of social pressures to not be like their queer parent(s).  It's not okay to pressure kids to have a certain sexuality or gender.  Of course, the rest of the fucking world brutally forces everyone else, but still.  And of course if I had a child that was hetero and cis and neurotypical, I would love them too.  Though there's still a part of me that, when reading studies of "same sex" parenting and they emphasize that the kids won't turn out queer, is rather disappointed by that news. 

Yet another reason to get rid of those things...

Sometimes, when I am not binding and I eat crumbly food, crumbs get in my cleavage.  Stinking boobs, I want rid of you so much.

On "Safe Spaces"

There are some debates around the notion of "safe spaces" and here are a few of my thoughts:

A space cannot be safe for oppressed people and, to some lesser degree, their supporters if it does not have a general atmosphere and understanding of working towards not engaging in oppression against them.  A safe space for a queer person must be a non-homophobic space, a safe space for a trans person must be a non-transphobic space, a safe space for a black person must be a non-racist space.

Can any place with privileged people (especially with them in the majority) be a completely non-oppressive space?  We all internalize and participate in oppressions, but this is especially true for privileged people, as they benefit from the oppression.  Yes, there are privileged people who work on trying to stop engaging in oppression/combat oppressive systems, but this is often a hard issue with a lot of struggle.

However, if you make it an exclusive space, you end up risking having to police the boundaries of the oppressed class.  Also, it's obvious that even without that issue, you can't just set aside issues of making safe groups which will be mixed by their nature, as well as the issue of multiple axis of oppression.  If I can only have a group of low income (or low income raised), disabled, queer, genderqueer, atheist, etc. people for any activity, that's going to make it really hard to organize any groups at all.

That's not to say that I think there's never any value in exclusive spaces, I just don't think they are an ideal solution in many situations.

I tend to feel that "safe space" like coalition, is something that you build as a part of an ongoing process.  You can't just declare that something is safe, or tell someone something is safe if they express concerns about things going on. 

Maybe it would be better to try and work on building safer spaces rather than declaring safe spaces.

Well, That Was Helpful Information

So, I've been playing this zombie third person shooter I got for free way back when playstation gave out a small selection of free games as part of their apology for getting hacked and shit.  I don't have anything better to play at the moment, and, for some reason, I'm growing a bit tired of playing Dragon Age Origins over again.  So, I decided to give this thing a try, but I set it on the easy mode "braindead" instead of the regular "undead" mode, because, hey, I usually don't play either shooters or action games, being more of an strategy/turn based rpg preferring person in general.  And, it's been tolerable, even though it makes me squint to see things even on my bigger tv (a combo of issues with the game's visibility and my shit vision, but, hey, medicaid stops paying for glasses after 21, so there's no hope on the latter front).  Well, while it was loading, the game too the liberty of informing that "Real men play on undead mode".  To which I thought "well, then for us non-"real men", can we play on any mode we like?", also, in rolling my eyes at its presumed maleness of the player, I recalled that I am playing as the female PC.  This game assumed I was a gender insecure man even while I was playing as the female character.  Way to go on that one.

Look, Talking Boobs (a.k.a. Sexual Objectification is Still Totally a Thing)

This is an actual panel from the Ao No Exorcist manga:

Female characters are depicted as sexual objects.  She is reduced to nothing but a pair of waterballoon breasts.  By the way, reading this manga will also teach you that her boobs and top do not obey the laws of physics.  Of course, the bikini has to be magic to keep them from popping out.

I've been sick

I have been sick, but I am starting to feel a bit better.

When I am sick, I have even stranger dreams than usual.  Last night, I dreamed that I was a member of an traveling RV camp and that I kept having to rescue an android from zombies.  Why?  This makes no sense.  Why would an android even need protected from zombies?

Star Ocean

Crowe stole my space elf bishie!  I could forgive the fact that he was cooler than my guy, but this, this is unforgivable!  Go die in a spaceship fire, Crowe.

Phrases I Hate, Example #1

"Giving voice to the voiceless"

Why do I hate this?  Because it is denying that oppressed and marginalized people already have voices and opinions.  It is very, very paternalistic.  Rather than pointing out that these people are not being listened to, are not fairly being given access to platforms, are harassed when they speak, etc. it pretends that the people at issue have nothing to say for themselves and no opinions of themselves and need a privileged person to tell other privileged people what the oppressed people's needs are in order to "rescue" them.

This phrase is almost never appropriate, so I decided to try and think of times when it would not actually be used in a foolish privileged way:

1) Talking about non-human animals 

"Hey, everybody, I'm totally giving a voice to these voiceless bees!"

2) Fictional Characters

"The new writer gave that wizard a voice where before the series had made the character rather voiceless."

3) Autotune

"Autotune gives a good voice even to those who have no voice at all."

4) Hallucinations about inanimate objects

"That acid I was tripping on gave a voice to the voiceless stuffed animals."

Sensa Fatphobic Ads, Part 2

So, here's yet another fatphobic Sensa ad.  This time, I got screengrabs of both the beginning and end result of the animation.

In addition to being organ free at the end, you'll note she must be incredibly short at the beginning too (and grows in height for the end measurements), judging by the text, as she's supposedly the "size 14".  Here's what a size 14 looks like:

The ad both distorts the end body beyond all possibility and misrepresents what a typical size 14 body would look like. 

Just for the record, here's a model who is between size 8 and 10, notice all of the room for organs and such:

Women's bodies come in many shapes and sizes, but none of them come in the shape and size of the end result of these Sensa ads.

Hunger Strike

In honor of the eleventh day of the UVA student hunger strike, here's a little Temple of the Dog:

More on the hunger  strike here http://blog.aflcio.org/2012/02/27/uva-students-football-player-on-hunger-strike-for-workers-living-wage/

And Jill Stein of the Green Party has put up contact information for the UVA President on her candidacy website (she's a Green Party Presidential Candidate): www.jillstein.org/virginia_students_hunger_strike?utm_campaign=va_keystone_1&utm_medium=email&utm_source=jillstein

Administrative Inconvenience

A cis hetero woman who gets married can easily and cheaply change her name.  She need not spend hundreds of dollars (or spend large amounts of time applying for fee waivers if she is impoverished).  She does not need to meet publication requirements.  She need not demonstrate her need to change her name.  Nor does she have to face great difficulty if she has debt or a criminal history.  She does not have to worry about being treated as suspicious if she moved recently and she will be presumed not to be a fraud.

Yet, to change my legal name so that I no longer have to have my hated birth name on all of my documents, must do all of these things (except demonstrate need to change the name, because my current state of residence is one of the few that does not require strong reason to change a name, I also have no criminal record, but this is by coincidence the petition does inquire about these things).

This is one of the many cases where the needs of the dominant group, in this case cis heteros engaging in normative cis hetero activities, are deemed perfectly acceptable and convenient, yet everyone else’s needs are deemed troublesome and as warranting suspicion.  If a cis woman getting married changing her name is no trouble, a trans person changing their name shouldn’t be either.

Is Genderqueer a Political Identity?

Yes and no.  No, being genderqueer isn’t like being pro-gun control, it is an identity, not a position.  Does being genderqueer identified say something about me and the way I view gender?  Yes, but by that standard, so does the identities of those who are cis, are binary IDed, etc.  If my gender identity is political, so are binary IDed cis people’s.  Binary cisgendered identities are only seen as apolitical insofar as they are treated as the norm and as the default human.  

We often do this with marginalized or stigmatized identities.  The rights and lives of trans people, queer/lgb people, people of color, people with disabilities, women, poor people, colonized people, etc. are seen as objects of public scrutiny and as “political issues”.  But marginalized identities are not inherently more political than centered ones.  Oppression is not primarily an “issue” of the oppressed, rather it is an issue with the oppressors.  If being against an enforced binary gender system is a political position, than the opposite position, being in support of an enforced binary system, is also a political position. 

You know what?  I would fucking love it if being genderqueer were as easily accepted, acknowledged, and given rights as being cis and binary and we didn't have to engage in political and social struggles.  I would fucking love not having to fight for rights, not having to navigate through unfavorable legal and social minefields, not having to swallow the vomit that rises in my throat when confronted with being forced to put myself in a gendered box.  It would make my life so much easier.  I would love to not have to be “political”, but until that day comes, I won’t accept being told to stop fighting to protect myself or others like me (and others not like me who are given shit too).  The frontlines of this “political” struggle isn’t a game to me, it is my life. 

Loose Weight and Organs!

Since I am somewhat random, welcome to my first substantive post, here it goes:

So, I am listed as female on my yahoo details (public profiles allow not listing a binary gender, but registration did not), so it gives me gendered ads based on that.  So, I see one of those fatphobic weightloss ads where a fat person shrinks into a thin person on the side while I'm checking my email.  As I watch it she shrinks from fat to medium to thin to…organless.  I did not manage to get a screengrab of the beginning stage of the animation, but this was the end result:

Wasp waisted and organless, a literally impossible beauty standard.

Of course, maybe I am wrong, given the history of unsafe diet drugs, I suppose having all of your abdominal organs and some of your bones melt and warp is conceivable…